Mental Gymnastics: Balancing self-criticism with self-compassion
It's seriously so easy to look at our life and think about all the things that are wrong with it. I’ve been on a mental battlefield these past few days, mentally ripping myself to shreds. I need to be more consistent, I need better routines, I don't stick to the boundaries I create... yadiyadiyadaaaa. And while all of those things are true, and it's important to set goals for ourselves, it's also extremely important to give ourself grace.
I may never be Nara Smith, cooking from scratch, and that is okay. I may never be in the gym five days a week crafting a perfectly toned body, and that is okay. I may never be able to flip $50 into $500 through investments, and that is okay. The era of social media we’re in has us constantly feeling the need to be the best person that could possibly exist. And while I do strive to be my best self, I think holding space for the woman we are today- who we once dreamed to be- is important as well.
Knowing we could do better and putting ourself in position to do just that, is empowering. This isn't to deter you away from that, because we all deserve to go after the things we want and work towards being our highest self. However, it’s also essential to celebrate the small wins and acknowledge the progress we’ve made, no matter how small it might seem. Maybe you’re more patient than you used to be, or perhaps you’ve learned how to set boundaries, even if you don’t always stick to them. Every step forward is worth celebrating.
It's really hard to live in the 21st century and not look across the street to see if the neighbor's grass is greener. I am constantly having to remind myself that everyone’s journey is different, and what works for someone else might not work for me. Focusing on our own path and progress, rather than trying to measure up to someone else’s standards, is the key to finding peace within ourselves. We often strive for perfection, but the truth is, nobody is perfect. Accepting our imperfections and understanding that they don’t define our worth is crucial to living a more fulfilled and content life.
Instead of dwelling on what we’re not doing or where we're falling short, we have to focus on what we can control. What small steps can we take today that align with our goals and values? Progress is progress, no matter how incremental. And just as we would extend kindness and understanding to a friend, we should do the same for ourselves.
Think about the challenges we’ve overcome, the lessons we’ve learned, and the ways we’ve grown. Growth is not a straight line; it’s a journey with ups and downs. Some days we’ll feel on top of the world, and other days we might struggle. Both are part of the process, and both are okay.
It’s important to set goals, but it’s equally important to make sure those goals are realistic and attainable. Lets not set ourself up for failure by aiming for perfection—lets aim for progress instead. And don’t forget the importance of rest. Rest is a crucial part of growth. Pushing yourself too hard without allowing time for rest and rejuvenation can lead to burnout. Sometimes, the most productive thing we can do is to take a break... and there is nothing wrong with that.
So For All The Girls Who feel like they are behind, not doing enough, or have a million task to complete before elevating their circumstances, lets remind ourself that our journey is uniquely ours. No one else has our exact combination of experiences, challenges, and strengths. We have to embrace your individuality and honor the path we’re on. There is always room for improvement, yes. But also, what are some things that I do today that my old self would be extremely proud of me for?
